Fatherhood

Help Your Kids Develop Art Appreciation. Part Two.

Explore painting
Show picturesque sceneries, colorful still-life, noble portraits by famous painters to your baby. Watching on them baby would get right understanding of beauty, color combinations and splendor of the world. Paintings render vivid emotions and even kids feel it.

Start with postcards or cards with famous paintings which have on their back side artist's name and painting title. Choose time when kid is in high spirits and satiated, and show him cards clearly pronouncing  their titles and painters. During a week show him some same cards and step by step add other new ones. 

Stop showing when you see that kid lost his interest and looks another way. Give such lessons several times a day – at home and in park. Baby would enjoy varied vivid pictures and gradually he would memorize them.

Exploring painting would enjoy you and besides this it helps you broaden horizons. When child would grow up a little, you may go together to the museum or art gallery. Your baby lying comfortably in a walking carriage would examine with delight painting masterpieces and recognize them.

Kids over one year may start learning to draw – let him perform at home or you may send him at painting courses for kids. Probably he would never become Rafael or Monet but he would have perfect imagination and excellent perception of painting.

Read
Reading is another interesting way to develop his imagination and promote love for beauty. You may start reading to your child since three months old. He will listen attentively to you and examine books with interest. Buy several books for kids with fairy tales. Sit down with your baby comfortably on a sofa, open the book and start reading expressively, show him pictures and explain who is painted on them.

The more you read to your baby, the sooner he acquires speech habits. Positive emotions wrap your baby from the earliest age and he starts to understand what love is. Besides this, well written fairy tales with beautiful tokens do develop intellect and child would have nice taste in literature.

Help Your Kids Develop Art Appreciation. Part One.

It is likely that each of us when looks at his child thinks about his future adult life and profession. We all wish him to have a beautiful and happy life.

Therefore we try to give useful attains and best education to our future spacemen, artists, lawyers.

Few parents think about the necessity of developing love for beautiful music and art, besides the education. It is necessary to start lessons of art from very early childhood – from three years old! Let us see the ways of developing interest in art. Let's see what should you do.

Listen to the music
Music has a profound effect over child emotions. Each parent knows that a soft and gentle lullaby is able to calm down a crying baby, and a merry song would cheer him up. Wordless music, especially classical one, also has great effects over baby. Classical music has a complicated structure and baby is able to recognize it from three months old.

This music has positive effects on children, it helps to educate the ear and develops fine musical taste. Child learns to listen, to feel and to reason. Besides this, music is a perfect calming remedy for fidgety kid. Try to set such classical pieces as operatic arias of Puccini or waltzes of Chopin.

Songs performed by Andrea Bocelli or Frank Sinatra have also positive effects on children, they rejoice them and children start to clap their hands. As a rule, children who listen to beautiful music since birth do develop better. Set much often beautiful music and soon you will notice that your child has got a favorite one.

Sing together
Do not forget to sing your baby lovely songs. Sing not only nursery rhymes but try to sing some classical songs. You will see that your baby listens to you very attentively when you sing. In this manner your voice helps him to master skills in speaking much quicker.

Play an instrument
Play on an instrument when child is behind you. It only seems that he does not understand anything, but in fact in his mind appear figurative images when he listens to beautiful music, and this has very positive effects on his world-view and it helps to develop true taste.

To be continued.

Parental Censure

It should seem that just a while ago your baby uttered long expected first word. However, in several years his lexicon has significantly expanded and you observed it contains some unchildish words.

Certainly, invectives spoken by baby humble parents – how came he to know them? Who is to blame that he started using bad language and how to dishabituate him of it?

At 2 – 5 years old child starts using bad language unwittingly and he does not know the meaning of words he uses. Baby just repeats invectives after somebody and often the “teachers” are adults themselves. In quarrels parents not always control their words which are inappropriate in child's presence. In return, he repeats after you as he thinks bad language is best way to express his emotions.

Another source of bad language may be kinder-garden or his friends. Peers in the same way repeat after adults bad words. Forbiddenness makes these words more “attractive” -  children over five years already understand that it is not allowed to damn and thus they do it from spite. This is a kind of riot against common moral standards and rules, therefore it is difficult to fight with this behavior. Teenagers use bad language as they think they look more older than their peers. In quarrels with friends child uses bad words to hide his weakness.

How to dishabituate child from invectives?
Foremost, you should control yourself and your words, exclude “bad” ones which child may hear and remember. Replace invectives with other more appropriate words.

Certainly it is impossible to completely isolate child from bad language - on the street, at kinder-garden or at school he will hear it for sure. However, when you do not use them at home, this shows him that such words are not accepted in your family and thus you will create favorable atmosphere at home.

If you never use invectives at home but you hear them from your child, then source of bad language  are his peers. In this case you should abstain from negative comments about his friends because it would only aggravate the situation.

Secondly, it would never do to pretend that you did not hear invectives because child may say them again. He may think that you allow him say invectives if you say nothing. Do not question him who taught him bad words as with this you draw his attention on damns.

When you hear bad words for the first time from your child try to react gently, without emotions, do not hurry to scold and punish him. Try to explain him gently that these are bad words and it would never do to use them. If the case repeats again, you may leave him without computer games or TV for a  particular period of time.

Flying with Kids

It is not a secret that different children react differently to flyings. Challenge of flying with a kid brings most parents in shivers as many children react negatively to noises, big crowds of people, pressure differences. Therefore, parents try to avoid flyings with airplanes.

However, often airplane is most suitable mean of traveling with your kid. Check below major tips how to make flying with kids more comfortable for your family.

1.  Choose convenient time
Try to avoid long plane flights as they are exhausting not only for adults but for children too. Two – four hours is most optimal time for flying with kids. Take into consideration sleeping time of your child when you plan your flight. If departure time coincides with his sleeping time, then he may sleep during the whole flight.

2. Check in preliminarily
Try to arrive in airport in plenty of time or check in online. This will prevent you from waiting lines and possibly you would get comfortable seats behind business class.

3. Take toys on the board
Take favorite toy of your child and buy several new ones. During flight he will play with them and feel himself comfortable. By the way, many air companies make little gifts for small travelers such as plush toys or interesting table games for the whole family.

4. Watch cartoons
Take portable DVD-player with you on the board, charge its batteries before the flight and choose several cartoons for your kid. Watching cartoons would entertain your kid and cheer him up. Possibly, on the board there would be opportunity to take DVD-player on lease.

5. Create comfort conditions for your child
Remember that even in hot day there would be quite coolly in the plane, therefore take warm cloths on the board or ask stewardess to bring you a rug.  Do not forget to take alternative cloths as child may get dirty. Even during 2-hour flight he may get tired to stay at one place, therefore as soon as appears occasion  have a little walk on the board. Thumb through magazines and show him pictures. To more adult children you may tell something about airplanes.

6. Take care of child nutrition
Take on the board hash with you or preliminarily order special nutrition for your kid which will be served on the board. Do not forget about water, give children water to drink at the time of takeoff and landing as swallowing movements help to avoid ear pains. It would be better to take his favorite biscuits and candies with you. You may take water and food as many as you need - airport workers permit to do it. However, they may ask to taste them in order to exclude transportability of forbidden substances.

7. Do not forget medicines
Take with you all necessary medicines, especially those from vomit, pains in abdomen and ear pains. First consult your doctor, he will help you make a list of necessary medicines.

8. Keep calm and be in high spirits
Play and talk to your child. Keep calm and talk about your further holiday. Kids feel everything, therefore it is important for them to see their parents confident and in high spirits.

Children and Divorce

Parent's divorce is great stress, sadness and mess for a child regardless of his age. Tips below  would help you make child suffer less in this difficult family situation.

Sometimes parents are so much dip into their problems that do not think about their child's sufferings.

Child experiences feelings of incertitude, anger and fear as he cannot imagine parents living apart. At the time of divorce it is very important to pay greater attention to your children and take care of them.

Tell children first about divorce
After you took the decision of divorce, tell it at once to your child. Do not tell him it late. Your child will need plenty of time to go with this thought and he must get used to the changes. Both parents should be presented during this talk.

Take control of yourself
If the divorce was initiated by your spouse and you are overflowed with negative emotions towards him, try not to project them on your child. Never tell him how bad your wife/husband is. Remember that child experiences more stress than you do. He loves both parents equally and would miss one parent. Child is not able to understand that his mother/father was wrong. In this situation child would rather blame you that you hate your wife/husband and it is you who provoked his leave.

Make an agreement with friends and relatives
Convoke family council and work a common strategy of behavior with your child. Explain grandmas that they must not blame parents in happened and never tell the details of their relationship. Father should never offend former wife in children presence. You will always remain family for your child. It is important that relatives keep in touch with child same way as it was before divorce. Never prevent your child from walks with former relatives and never refuse from their presence on family holidays. Never sort out your relationship in child's presence as it would be painful for him to watch your conflict.

Explain your child the situation
Choose the appropriate moment and talk to your children. Tell that there is no child's guilt in parent's divorce. Tell him that parents do still love him and want to take care of him as before. Tell that sometimes people should live apart in order to be happy. Tell that he would visit father/mother and spend time as before. Never sidetrack the issue “why did it happen” and do not go into details, there is no point in that.

Be ready to any reaction of your child
Some children cry and get angry, others are happy that finally tension in their family ended. Younger children may require your special involvement. Child may shrink into himself. Spend more time together and tell him more frequently how much you love him. Unfortunately, some children take divorce so close to their heart that start suffering from cardio-vascular diseases.

Let your child tell his opinion
Listen attentively to your child and let him say what he thinks. Probably his thoughts would seem to you stupid and some phrases would offend you. Do not hurry to get angry. He experiences stress now and releases his emotions. Help him express his feelings when he wants it.

Do not rush things
Try to mark time and do not bring home another lover. This would make child jealous and make him feel useless.

Posture Correction In Children

Most parents often abuse their children for posture saying it looks like a question mark. Straight and correct posture in children is uncommon, but curvature of the spine is main reason of going to childish orthopaedist.

Bad posture spoils not only appearance but may cause different illnesses. It is necessary to take care of posture from childhood.

Formation of spine starts in the first days of fetus development and lasts until 20 – 22 years old. Until 5 – 6 month of pregnancy the spine grows rapidly – about 2 – 3 cm each week. However, starting from third trimester pace slows down and spine continues to grow just by half centimeter. During antenatal period and first years of life childish bones and muscles of the spine develop unsteadily. Great effects on this has lifestyle of pregnant woman - contagious diseases, medications, smoking, alcohol may provoke various pathologies.

Baby stays in tipped position in mother's placenta during whole antenatal period, and keeps it at first weeks of his life. At the beginning, spine forms from cartilages and by the moment of birth the proportion between young bones and cartilaginous tissues is equal. Gradually bone tissue replaces  cartilaginous tissue, and by 14 years old child's spine consists of bones. Cartilaginous tissue in spine prevents child from learning simple skills. During one month baby learns to hold his head up, and only in 5 – 6 months makes first attempts to independent sitting and crawling. To make listed actions, child puts much more efforts than an adult because his muscles are too weak. Therefore baby must lead an active lifestyle, play special games directed on strengthening of various muscle groups.

Most important time of spine grow is first year of baby life. Spine grows rapidly (20cm in a year) and during first 12 – 18 months occurs formation of physiological curve of the spine. At this time it is necessary to control posture of your child because germs of scoliosis, rickets and other spine deformations acquired in childhood would hardly be improved in future. 

Period between 5 – 8 years old is very important time of muscle development and spine bones grow. At this time child goes to school.

Most schoolchildren find it uncomfortable to sit at the desk with straight spine, however, they spend a lot of time  in semiflexed position. Weak childish spine gets used to such position very rapidly. Childish scoliosis occupies leading positions in the list of causes which make parents go to orthopaedist. Therefore, it is very important  at the beginning of child's education to learn him to keep his posture straight and not to hunch.

Never forget about sport. Physical activity helps to strengthen muscular system and to improve immunity. For correct posture it is good to occupy with swimming, volleyball, basketball, gymnastics, skiing and skating. It is necessary to see orthopaedist regularly. Buy orthopaedic mattress as correct posture of spine is important also during sleep.

Scoliosis is a spine deviation from straight posture. You can recognize it all alone. Most evident signs of scoliosis: position of shoulders and shoulder blades at different levels, curved pelvis, soles of footwear inequally down-at-heal, bent of body or head to one side. After recognition of these signs you should go to the specialist. Never try to treat scoliosis all alone. Only specialist will prescribe right treatment. Never leave this disease untreated, because scoliosis may cause cardio-vascular diseases, gastrointestinal diseases and even pathologies in brain developing.

The Relationship Between Parents and Children

  Everyone heard phrase “Children always remain children for their parents”.  It is really so? Are children really children for their parents for the whole life? When children are small they need parental care and attention as they don't know what life is.

They cannot eat, drink, dress, go to the toilette all alone, parents should explain lots of new things, for example, that children must not fish hooks into socket and never strangle a kitty. To blend in life children need most experienced person which would guide and learn them.

When a child goes to school without knowing how to tie his shoelaces, it raises laugher in classmates and generally affects him negatively. It is bad because parents controlled child all the time and never allowed him to approve himself even when the talk was about tying his shoelaces.

When child being in seven form cannot prepare breakfast for himself and is waiting while parents would do that for him, it would never do because child would be poorly prepared for the future life. Probably, it is not difficult for parents to prepare breakfast for their children, but parents should understand that it is better to learn children do it all alone in order to not fit him to careless. Child must learn to do these things, though it would be  difficult and even stressful for him as he used to not take care about them before.

All big things start from little ones. At this stage parents should give their children more freedom to take care of themselves. Parents should allow children to learn and to make mistakes. Sure, it is easier to make everything quickly and perfectly than to let child do it slowly and not correctly, but it would never do for his growth. Otherwise parents would tie children to them. As a result children would always advice with parents, tell them everything, depend on them and their opinion. Child would reach 20, 30, 30, 40 years but he will remain a child not able to take decisions by himself.

Children are always children for their parents, but the relationship between them changes with time. First these are instructions and control, but with age it must transform just into advice. As a result, parents and children in adult age would have friendly relationship. Sure child will remain child, but parental care now should show differently. It is not about making breakfasts but about support and understanding.

Be a Parent and a Friend to Your Child

When characterizing relationships between parents and children, often are used two established phrases  “Children can't choose their parents” and “You are lucky enough to have your son/daughter”. First phrase cannot be contested, but the second may be discussed.

Exactly said, you are lucky to have yourself. It means parenting was performed correctly so that you became a real friend to your child and as a result you may account for friendly attitude from him.

Friendship between parents and children is a result of meticulous work of both heart and mind, indefinite love for your child especially in case of adopted children.

It is absolutely impossible to deceive a child. They delicately feel falseness and sincere interest to their personality, especially in case of adopted children, and they initially are not own children. Permanent preaching tone of voice in relation to child is not appropriate.

To let your children open their hearts to you, you must be sincere with them. In all things. Great power has a proper example. Child will never give credit to your sincere friendship in case your words do not coincide with your actions. Not only in relation with him and also with your friends, colleagues, etc.

Even when you are very busy you must find time for straight talk with your child. Kids room is a perfect place for such discussions, it looks like you came there on a visit. There must be no forbidden topics.  Discuss topics gently, use phrases like “Maybe I get it wrong, but I think...” This will help your children understand that you sincerely wish to share with them your experience, protect them from worries and give them sound advice.

The more you talk with your child about the things he is interested in (modern music, movies, fashion), the more he opens to you. He will not accept it as parenting but as sincere friendship.

Don't think it would be easy. You must reach the level of your child to not be ridiculous in his eyes. Just reach them. Sadly, but in many issues children precede adults! What can you do? Try to attend some events together with your child without intruding but having tactical ploy. All those actions must be managed by parental forgiving love and not blind one. Say in private to your child open-heartedly about his faults and never do it in public.

Thrush (Oral candidiasis) in Babies

After birth baby faces many problems. Each second his small body faces dangers, because immune system is not formed yet and the body cannot protect itself from infections. Most often in first year babies occurs thrush. Thrush makes baby capricious and irritable, baby refuses from food.

If you observed your baby became anxious, see if he has or not white deposit in his mouth, small white spots on his tongue, gums and inner side of cheeks. Those spots are called Candida fungus and they cause thrush. White deposit gets removed easily, however, below fungus are inflammatory tissues which make baby feel pain and discomfort.

 Thrush develops at the back of disbacteriosis, disregard of rules of personal hygiene. Baby may get the disease from his infected mother, independently from the way he was born (natural way or Caesarian operation). Malignant bacteria may also enter baby's body via bottles for feeding or nipples which were badly sterilized. Coexisting illnesses (various infections) and gastrointestinal tract disorders contribute to thrush development.

 It is not a secret that it is more easily to prevent problem than to solve it. You should pay attention to oral health status of your baby, follow all rules of hygiene and go to the doctor at once you see signs of inflammatory diseases.

In first weeks of pregnancy women must make analysis for candida. In case thrush was found, necessary treatment is prescribed. During lactation, nursing mother may include in her meals some fermented milk products (natural yoghurts), grapefruit juice, etc. However, if your baby has allergy, mother should be careful with such products.

Remember that thrush is a disease which shows not only externally with fungic deposits on mucosal membranes, but also with negative efffects on internals which reduces immunity in baby. From mouth cavity thrush may spread to internals, skin, genitalia.

Choosing most effective and safe way of thrush treatment depends on individual peculiarities of baby organism. When you notice first symptoms of thrush in your baby, you should at once go to the doctor.

In mild form of the disease he will prescribe 2% solution of cooking soda. In severe form will be prescribed antifungal and immune stimulationg drugs, and ointments. The treatment must be complex – follow all doctor's directions including hygiene and healthy food.

Healthy Vacation With Children

Vacations may be darkened with health problems in children. Often it occurs due to parent's inattention and banal ignoring elementary rules of hygiene.

Besides this, problems with health may occur after heat stroke or may be caused by conditioners.

In case your child got heat stroke, you should move him in cool place and provide maximum access to fresh air. You should put ice on his body or cold water. Such cold applications must be placed in armpit and neck area. Let him drink plenty of water.

With food intoxication things are much worse. Signs of intoxications may appear even the next day. At the beginning you think that everything is all right, however, in child's body occurs corresponding reaction on consumed product. Sensibility.

In case your child has symptoms of nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, abdomen pains, it is necessary to make full stomach lavage as soon as possible. Do not make it by yourself, it must be performed in a medical institution with the help of special tube.

Common tips for healthy vacation:

 - never buy little-known products of doubtful provenance. Certainly, you want to taste everything but try to avoid it. Buy food in known and trusted places;
 - before each food intake you should wash your hands with a soap;
 - on the beach do not buy food sold by Cheap Jacks;
 - always have with you in the bag a bottle of water and activated carbon;
 - in sunny weather go outside in headwear;
 - do not stay under hot sun rays. Go to the beach in early morning hours and you will surely get bronze suntan. It is not necessary to stay under direct sunrays – you also get suntan when you swim.