Benefit Of Family Quarrels

Quarrels occur in every family for opinions of two people living together often differ. There is such opinion that if people do not quarrel then their relationship (including sex) are in obsolescent stage. So heart-to-heart talk is important for normal family existence and developing.

Animosity exchange and “reset” of negative emotions are necessary for love exchange. The point is that in every person are fighting two opposite needs: the one side wants to merge with beloved person, and the other side wants to consolidate its personality showing greatness of their ego.

When people live together, those two extremes always are confronting. Small home wars allow not to lose this ego. That is why a small quarrel sometimes is a quite good thing to save normal relationship of partners. If both partners suppress their wish to tell sore, then discharge takes no place, so the accumulated temper finds itself different ways to release – depressions, withdrawal, intention to do everything in spite of the partner...

 Men usually in such situations raise their voice to a shout. The responsibility for that martial rack bears male sexual hormone – testosterone. Harold Persky from Einstein Medical Center in Philadelphia proved that the level of aggressiveness and the need in quarrel depend on the concentration of this hormone. In women it is produced just 10% of male level. Probably, that is why they rarely shout.

But women are inclined to sort out their relationship. This happens because women do reason on basis of emotions and men on basis of facts. In a research conducted by author of dissertation “Women in rage” it was revealed that most emotional and as a result most irritable are young women. Women over 50 years do cry, quarrel and need to clear out negative emotions more rarely. Peak of “scandalism” as American scientists say occurs in 40 years.

And while women beat dishes being in rage and men “kick up a quarrel”, other couples enjoy love to each other and... do good for their health. Doctors say that happy feelings that follow love are the best remedy. It turned out, that happiness does good to immune system, increases the number of safety cage and as a result those who are in love get sick rarely.

If atmosphere in your family was heated, you should sort out your relationship rationally in order to find right solutions of your problems. For that purpose you should follow next rules:

• the most important thing is not offend your partner. Words hurting ego do remain in memory for a long time and to remove them is very and very hard.

• avoid words such as “You always do like this!”, “You are like your mother!” and other of that kind. Do not involve in quarrel other persons.

• if you want to quarrel try to do it in absence of children.

 

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